Washington Park

This was from the summer but there are so many cute pictures not to post! This past July, the Meiman's came to visit us for a whole week! It was the perfect week! Not only did we spend lots of time catching up but mom had her "off week" from chemo so she was feeling great. We celebrated Kaleb's first birthday, went swimming, went to a wedding and had lots of cousin time. One evening we all went out to dinner to Buckhead's on the river and then drove over to Washington Park. It was so much fun. It is such a beautiful park! Perfect scenery, easy to get to, and lots of fun things for the kids to do. The boys LOVED the fountain. Austin will love it next year.

It always takes Braylen a little bit of time to warm up to certain situations. He's very careful to get "involved" until he becomes a little familiar with his surroundings. Kaleb on the other hand, jumped right in. I'm pretty sure that this night was one of the greatest times of his life. :)

Team Linda & Best Day Ever

Sorry for the lack of posting lately.There are so many great things to report! So thanks for coming back and checking it.

2 months ago we participated in the Cincinnati Ovarian Cancer Awareness Run/Walk 5K. We created a team in support of mom (Team Linda) and we were so thrilled to have over 75 friends and family participate in this race with us. Seriously. 75 people came out! People we knew and loved, and new friends that we had never met before. One of my mom's clients and friends donated our Team Linda tshirts and all the money we raised selling them went towards my mom's medical bills. We raised around $800 for her bills. We are so thankful for that day. My main goal for this race was to get as many people as possible to join our team, so that on the day of the race, my parents could look around and see some of the people who have been loving and praying for them. It was a very special day. Right after the race, I had made reservations at Sky Galley restaurant for anyone that was able to stick around and eat with us. We had about 25 close friends and family members eat with us.

The day before the race, mom received a phone call from one of her nurses in the cancer center. They knew she had a special day planned and they wanted to let her know that her scan came back clear. My family knew going into the race that things were looking pretty great for mom. That definitely made our day even more wonderful.

On September 17th, we received the official news that my mom is CANCER FREE!!!! We are so overjoyed by this news and so thankful to our Great Physician that he has allowed her to overcome this disease. We were all packed into the little check-up room when Dr. Shellhaus came in with the nurse. He said that her scan couldn't have looked better. It came back clear and the cancer is gone. Wow. He said a few other things and then he left. I was like, okay. That's it? I asked the nurse if this means she is actually cancer free and she said yes! Yes it does. Praise God. The 4 of us (mom, dad, Jess and I- Austin was there too but he was asleep) all stepped outside the cancer center and hugged and cried. What a journey. 

**I love this picture of Braylen running to the finish line. He actually believed that he won the race.** 

Thank you to everyone who participated with Team Linda. Thank you to those who sacrificed their time, money, made dinner, sent letters, emails, donated tshirts, etc. You have all played a huge role not only in the healing of my mom's cancer but also in her state of sadness and anger throughout this experience. When she was feeling bitter or sad, you would send her a note in the mail saying that you were thinking and praying for her. When she was sick and couldn't find anything to eat, you gave her Graeter's and brought her cherry icee's (that's for you dad!). When she was cold, you  made her lovely blankets and brought her warm socks. When she was too sick to be outside, you brought her beautiful flowers. When she was restless, you would be praying to our Heavenly Father to heal her body and heart. THANK YOU! God used you in my parents lives and we will all be forever changed by your servant hearts. 

Today is the final day of mom's chemo treatment. After this treatment, she will begin another treatment that is similar to chemo but not as hard on her body. This will be another precaution/prevention tool and she will be on this medicine for about a year. As of now, her insurance company has denied the request of using this particular medicine, but her doctor will continue to submit the request until it is approved.

The journey is not over.

There are still hoops to juggle.

There are still things to process.

But one thing we know is God is present, constant and the creator of all things. Even cancer. John Piper says in his article "Don't Waste Your Cancer," that you will waste your cancer if you do not believe that cancer is designed for you by God. He says, "What God permits, he permits for a reason. And that reason is his design. If God foresees molecular developments becoming cancer, he can stop it or not. If he does not, he has a purpose. Since he is infinitely wise, it is right to call this purpose a design. Satan is real and causes many pleasures and pains. But he is not ultimate. So when he strikes Job with boils (Job 2:7), Job attributes it ultimately to God (2:10) and the inspired writer agrees: “They . . . comforted him for all the evil that the Lord had brought upon him” (Job 42:11). If you don’t believe your cancer is designed for you by God, you will waste it."

That is equally comforting and hard to hear at the same time. I choose to trust because the opposite is choosing to believe that God would be out to destroy. I know that's not true. If you have time, go here and read the rest of John's article. It will greatly change your perspective of cancer.

Thanks for reading! I hope to start updating more often.

Help Us FIGHT Ovarian Cancer!

If you have been following this blog, you will know that my mom is going through an incredible journey right now. You can read about the start her (our) journey by going here. She has been going through chemo and is half way through her 18 week treatments. As soon as she was diagnosed, we started looking for races to run in as a way to fight along with our mom. We found the Power is Teal 5K Run/Walk for Ovarian Cancer Awareness in Cincinnati. We decided that this would be the perfect race for us to be apart of!

We are inviting you to join us as we run/walk in this race for our mom! You can support us by joining TEAM LINDA and signing up for the race. There is a competitive run, a competitive walk and a casual walk. We will have lots of people (including me and my kids) walking in the casual walk category. The race is at Lunken Field in Cincinnati and is on September 15th. This is a great way to show support for our mom and other woman (Debbie Warning, Linda Warnick) who are going through this courageous fight. You can also support us financially as a way to join Team Linda. All of our finances raised will go towards their medical bills  We would like to raise $500 to give to Ken and Linda before the race begins in September!

It is so important to us to show our mom that we are fighting along with her and my dad. Let's smother her with support by getting lots of friends and family together for this race. It costs $25 to register and you can click here to join our team/register. If you donate extra money on their website, that will go towards the Ovarian Cancer Society. If you donate via our blog that will go directly to Ken and Linda. It is a secure website that sends funds directly to a paypal account that we have set up.

I should note that a few years ago, a friend's wife (Libby) in our Young Life community was diagnosed with cancer. Her friends and family rallied around her to support her fight. During her journey, they all helped raise money for their medical bills and ran in a 1/2 marathon for Team Libby! I have been given a lot help and inspiration from her blog and her own fight. She is now cancer free! PTL! Go here and read her story. 

We would love to have 25-30 racers on our team! Braylen says it will be fun. I'd also like to give props to my awesome husband who has been kicking butt training for this race! He is down to 9 minute miles and is running a 5K three nights a week! Seriously. He started a month ago. He's amazing. If you see him running on Hopeful, just give a honk and a "Go Team Linda!" 

1/2 Way There! & Birthdays

I just finished reading this awesome book called "Love Does" by Bob Goff. Bob became a Christian through Young Life in high school and was a YL leader for a few years in college. He has these crazy life experiences and stories that literally don't seem real. I've been telling people that each chapter you read is like a club talk. He tells a short story and then relates it to scripture or to the character of Jesus. I love it. 

I've been so inspired by this book. "Love Does" is an outward expression of LOVE! It's not just people "saying" I love you but actually LOVING them, "with actions and in truth." Bob seems to be an "all in" type of person. With everything and everyone. He's a participant instead of a spectator. I've been thinking about my mom a lot during this book. This trial with my mom has been the hardest experience of my life. She is the only one who can physically experience what it's like to have cancer, but we are still "all in" with her. WE are FIGHTING with her. WE only have 9 more weeks of chemo. WE only have 3 more cycles to go. WE are 1/2 way finished! 

Guy always laughs at me when I use the word "we." I use it a lot. For example:

 

I will say to Guy:

"We need to cut the grass."

"We need to paint the kitchen."

"We need to put away the outdoor toys."

"We need to clean the bathroom."

You get the picture. And he always says "you mean I need to do these things." :) I'm sure this is a common phrase in most marriages. But that is truly how I see myself. As a "WE." As a partnership and family. And that's how I feel about mom. If someone asks me how she is doing, I'll tell them that she is doing great and moving along and that WE are almost through the treatments. I don't know if that is offensive to some people who have gone through something like cancer. But I don't care. Obviously, I will never know the extent of my mom's pain or even her fearful thoughts. But she will know that she is not alone and that Jesus is constant, real and always present. 

Mom just had her birthday a few days ago. She told me that birthdays have a whole new meaning to her now. They sure do! To celebrate her life is so special and amazing. And if you can believe this, mom spent her birthday shopping for someone else! I love that. The boys and I joined her to find a few bday items for Kaleb's 1 year bday party for next weekend. Afterwards we had dinner at her fav place  (TGIFridays -of all the places!) and ice cream at Orange Leaf. We gave her some presents and took a few pictures. We had just returned from a spontaneous trip from Charlotte to surprise the Meiman's but we did miss my sister and her family. Looking forward to seeing them next week again. 

Happy birthday to our sweet and strong mom. You are almost finished! Keep fighting! Keep the faith! 

 

Chemo Cycle #3 & The Surprise Carpet

Since my last post on June 4th, my mom's white blood cell count was still too low to begin her treatment. Her last treatment on May 24th and 25th really took a huge toll on her body! She tried to receive chemo the following two weeks and her count was still too low. Crazy! But her doctor decided to not push her schedule back and just skip her day 8 treatment (in a 3 week period, she receives treatment on day 1, day 2, day 8 and blood work on day 15). She was a little apprehensive to receive this news but Dr. S reassured her that her body is responding well to the chemo and it's not a set back. Mom actually had 4 weeks off from getting chemo! She gained her energy back, her appetite and got some extra snuggling time with baby Austin. Austin LOVES being held so it was a win-win for the both of them. :)

Mom started her third cycle this past Thursday, June 21st which was also my sister's birthday. Kind of bittersweet. Jess was away at Young Life camp ministering to some sweet high school girls. Mom found out that her CA-125 test (which is a blood test that they use as a tumor marker) was at a low number of 18! Her original number during surgery was 120! You can have a number of 35 and NOT have cancer. We are so very excited for this and thankful that the chemo is doing its job. She went through her hard treatment on Thursday and Friday and recovered over the weekend. She was very tired, super exhausted and a little bit nauseated. However I don't think it hit her body as hard as before. Mom! You are so very strong and an amazing example of courage and sacrifice. We love you so much!

Please continue to pray for our mom. Pray that our TRUE PHYSICIAN heals her body 100% and that the chemo continues to do it's job. Pray for her thoughts and for peace, as it is hard controlling her wandering mind. Our family verse has always been John 14:1 "Do not let your hearts be troubled; trust in God, trust also in me." It's amazing how we are forced to live this out now. How easy it is to trust in the "seen." Doctors, medicine, people; even things like sleep, comfort, relaxation, media, etc. Please capture our hearts Lord so that we are only trusting in you!

The next two and a half weeks look like this:

Thursday, June 28th: Day 8 treatment
Thursday, July 5th: Blood work
Monday, July 9th: MOM'S BIRTHDAY! We're so excited because she will have an off week during her birthday! Looking forward to some extra special birthday fun!

As an early birthday present, my parents came home to a super fun surprise after her treatment this past Thursday. They have an AMAZING group of friends who LOVE them so well. Prior to my mom's diagnosis, my dad had been working on refinishing the basement. Here is the video of the their surprise via YouTube! Please keep praying! If you want their address, message me-she still LOVES getting cards.

Chemo & 2nd Cycle Update

I'm a little bummed that it's been a few weeks since my last post. I've been trying hard to keep this updated with how things are going with my mom.  However, as if life isn't crazy already, Austin was diagnosed with torticollis and now has to go to physical therapy. :( His first appointment is this Thursday morning. I started to notice that he only looked to the right and had a lot of trouble looking to the left. I thought it might be his hearing but when I brought up to his doctor she said it was torticollis. I had no idea that was an actual diagnosis. She said it's nothing to be worried over and that PT will help his movements. Poor little guy. He has had such a hard few months. He is the sweetest little babe. Sleeping through the night, smiling like crazy. He is so adorable. He has a hard time napping but we're just going with it. Whatever works, right? SO NOT BABYWISE! Funny how things and routines are so different with baby #2.

We had the BEST time with my mom during her off weeks of chemo. She felt really good! My sister and Kaleb were still here and we went shopping, out to eat, to a Florence Freedom game, went swimming, and just got to be together! I was so thankful that my mom felt well enough to do these things. It's hard for her to be cooped up in the house all the time.

On May 24th and 25th, she started her 2nd cycle of chemo. She had a treatment to her shoulder on Thursday and then a treatment to her abdomen on Friday. Guy and I took the boys to Young Life camp for a leader retreat during Memorial Weekend so we were not here during this cycle, but Jess and her family stayed. On Saturday morning Jess called me and said that mom was feeling really good. She was up and walking around, and even sat outside for a bit. However, by that evening she started to feel pretty bad. She came down with a super swollen throat. She couldn't speak, eat, or take her medicine. I tried talking to her Monday morning but I could tell it was painful for her to speak. When you think you have a handle on your chemo symptoms something else comes up. It's best to have no expectations. With medicine my mom started to feel better by Tuesday. Her taste buds are still giving her a hard time and eating has not been fun.

My mom is an example of such strength and beauty. She is living her life in complete trust and faith that  God is in control. She is going through such a trial. We all are.

Something that one of the speakers said at our leader retreat was that when we are with Jesus in Heaven, we will no longer experience pain or heart ache or trials, etc. So when we experience them now on Earth, they should be special. This is the only time in our life on Earth that we can cling to Jesus for comfort and peace. We won't need to do that in Heaven. So for now we will .......

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." James 1:2-4

My mom was supposed to have chemo last Thursday but her white blood count was too low. As much as we hate that she has to have chemo, it's hard when you're told you can't do it. We're hoping that she is able to do it this Thursday. It's hard when her schedule gets pushed back; prolonging everything. Please be praying that she is able to go on Thursday. Please pray that God is healing her body and that the chemo is working. Pray that God continues to work in her heart and controls her thoughts. All of our thoughts!

Thank you for your support of our family. My parents feel so loved! Keep the cards coming too!

Off Week & Stiletto Sprint

We are very thankful for all of the love and support so many of you have shown my parents and family. Keep those cards and messages coming! This week marks the end of my moms first cycle of chemo! 5 more to go. She had to go today for blood work, which only took about 5 minutes. She is feeling better today and even ate Skyline for lunch. :) She is still having some pain in her stomach but that is most likely pain from her surgery 5 weeks ago. She is doing awesome!

Jess and Kaleb are here again and we are loving our time with them. We miss them so much (miss you too Vince!) Kaleb and Austin are only 8 months apart and we so look forward to them being sweet friends as they get older.

A few weeks ago Jess and Vince along with Andrew and a family from their church, ran in a Stiletto Sprint down in Charlotte. If you read my post from last week, you would have seen the picture of the men wearing their high heels. There are a few pictures below from the actual race. I could not even handle it- I was laughing so hard. Andrew bit the dust.

Jess was actually a finalist in the race! She rocks those high heels; walking and running in them. The only time I wear them is if I'm a bridesmaid and I have to! :) You can imagine how emotional it was for them to be there. I love that there are people doing small, crazy things to show my mom they are fighting with her. Even in heels! My sis also cut her beautiful hair to send to locks of love. She loves her long hair but wanted to do it as a way to connect with mom.

We are looking forward to spending time with my mom over this next week. She continues to grow stronger everyday, physically and spiritually. The Lord continues to reveal himself through this trial. He is present and so intentional with our family. Keep praying that the chemo works and that my mom wouldn't have symptoms from it. Also that she continues to fight and battle her thoughts.

Psalm 73:26
"My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. "

P.S. This is the first time using the blogger app from my phone. Pretty cool.

Finding Joy & Chemo: Week 2

Austin is 8 weeks old today and things are starting to "settle" down. Although when people ask me how I'm doing, the bitter part of me wants to say "well I'm sleep-deprived, my clothes don't fit, and my mom is sick! Thanks for asking!!" I would have never dreamed that Austin's first few weeks would be so crazy. God is sovereign in his timing, so I will continue to trust that he is in control of this crazy time.

My parents have felt sooo loved by sooo many friends and family members- cards, flowers, meals, books, candy, etc. I cannot imagine living my life outside a Christian community. How do you get through life's storms without a fellowship of believers??? What a true blessing it has been to see my mom feel tremendously loved and encouraged by people. A few Sunday's ago (prior to her chemo treatments), we spent the evening with my mom and dad. When we got there my mom was reading a book that her sister (my aunt Barb) gave to her. I can't remember the name but it is about a woman who lives in NKY, who is a breast cancer survivor. My mom was in tears talking about this woman's story. At one point my mom and Guy started talking about the Lord and his plan for her. Mom literally said through her tears, that she knows that God has chosen her out of everyone to have cancer, and that she wants to find joy in her sickness but she's not sure that she can. I was so blown away by her sincere expression of faith. WOW! For her to say that God has chosen her brought me to tears. Her faith is so genuine; desiring to find joy but struggling to find it! I know that we can all relate to that during our own life struggles. Last night my bible study girls were talking about James 1 and the verses on finding joy. James 1:2-4 says:

 ² Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,^[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, ³ because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. ⁴ Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

We were talking about how it's a choice to find joy. My mom could literally turn the opposite way and wallow in self pity (which is a natural tendency for all of us!!!) but she chooses joy and trust in the Lord. It's not easy and there are many times throughout the day that all of us question the Lord and feel super angry that this happened. But we are all hopeful that the testing of our faith will produce perseverance. And James 1:12 says:

  ¹² Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him.

Not only is God the true physician of her body but he is the true physician of her heart- molding her, shaping her, healing her in every part of her life.

Mom received chemo yesterday in her abdomen for about 6 hours. Today she is getting around ok but she is having some pain in her stomach. Please pray that she will defy the odds and have no, to very little symptoms from the chemo. She is getting some medicine today for nutrients and to boost her white blood cell count. The weekend seems to bring complete exhaustion and horrible pain in her abdomen.

Week 2-Finished!
16 more to go!

I'll be back with a new post of the Ovarian Cancer Awareness "Stiletto Sprint" that Jess, Vince and some friends ran a few weeks ago. Hilarious! Jess and Vince are fighting for mom all the way from Charlotte! The boys literally ran in this heels.....

Keep praying!

Chemo-Week 1

My mom (Linda) was supposed to begin her first round of chemo treatments last week but she came down with an infection from her surgery so they pushed it back to this week. They also changed up her treatments so they will be less "demanding" on her body. For 18 weeks she is going to the Cancer Care Center once or twice a week. The first week she goes on Thursday for 3 hours of chemo and then on Friday for 5-6 hours of chemo. The next week she goes on Thursday for 5-6 hours and she will possibly go on Friday as well. The third week she goes on Thursday for 2 hours for blood work. That is considered 1 cycle. She has 6 cycles.

My sister, Jessica, flew in from Charlotte on Wednesday with my nephew Kaleb. It's been nice to have them here for extra support for mom and dad (Ken). Jess went with my mom on Thursday (May 3) for her first treatment. The chemo is pumped into her body through a port they surgically imported into her shoulder. Since you're not allowed to bring kids back in the room, Jess sat outside with Austin so that I can sneak a few minutes alone with my mom during her treatment. The room is lined with recliners along the wall and there are patients sitting there hooked to an IV. What a surreal experience knowing that every single person is there for one reason. Some of the women wore scarves and others had their heads exposed. I had to try really hard to hold back my tears! Never in my life did I ever imagine sitting with my mom while she received chemo. She continues to amaze me as she courageously accepts this phase of her life. Afterwards, she said she felt pretty good. Her text message was "so far so good!" And she ate cheeseburger for dinner! :) Her only symptoms that night was not being able to sleep. The nurse told her to take some tylenol PM's to help with that.

Friday's treatment was a little more difficult because the chemo is given through an IV into a port in her abdomen, so she has to lay in a hospital bed for 5-6 hours. We've been told that some women refuse to go on with this treatment after the first week because it's so physically demanding on their bodies (nauseous, tiredness, etc). Her symptoms today (Saturday) have been complete exhaustion but no nausea. There is some pain in her stomach but she has been able to eat! Praise God for an appetite! She is taking her meds like clock work and keeping her stomach full by eating every few hours. We are hoping and praying that no other symptoms creep up and by tomorrow or Monday she starts to have more energy.

I've never fully understood what it meant to fight for your life during cancer/chemo. I know that we have a long, difficult road ahead but I see my mom FIGHTING! I see my dad and my family fighting. We're in this battle together. My mom is not only fighting against cancer but she has to ward off reactions to chemo. And more importantly she has to fight against negative thoughts that creep into her heart. She continues to desire to seek JOY in the midst of her suffering. She acknowledges Jesus as her true physician and knows that he is in control.

Please join us in praying for my mom! Pray that she doesn't have any symptoms from the chemo. Pray for complete healing! And pray that she continues to fight her thoughts (that was a special request from my mom).

"He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High, will rest in the shadow of the Almighty." Psalm 91:1

Week 1-Finished!
17 more to go!

March 16th & April 10th

On Thursday, March 15th at 6pm, Guy and I checked into the Birthing Center at St. Elizabeth Hospital to have our baby. I was being induced and we were excited to meet our little boy. 13 hours later we welcomed Austin Christopher Domec. Born at 7:53am, on March 16th. 8 pounds, 4 ounces and 21 inches long.

He was face up and after 2 hours of pushing, my doctor said we either try forceps or you will need an emergency c-section. I agreed to try because I was a little nervous to have a c-section. She first tried using the vacuum and that didn't work. I pushed 4 times and with the help of forceps, he came out. The first thing my doctor said while she laid him on my belly was don't worry about his cleft palate, we can give him surgery and it'll be fine! That was very unexpected. I was so confused and exhausted that I couldn't believe that's what she said. It turned out to be a very busted and swollen lip that is in perfect working condition today. :) He came out very bruised from the forceps and had a bit of jaundice (Braylen did too). He had a rough delivery. He also didn't have a name for about 2 hours. We were very thankful to meet our new little boy, and I was very thankful that the delivery and the pain was over. I had no idea what the Lord had planned for us over the next few weeks.....

We were released from the hospital on Sunday afternoon, knowing that we had to come back on Tuesday to check his jaundice. We went to have him checked on Tuesday afternoon and my doctor called me three hours later, saying we needed to come up and stay overnight in the hospital for 3 days. Austin's bilirubin count was 21 and a very dangerous number for his "age" was 25. We stayed in the ICU in a small room for 3 days. Austin stayed under the lights the ENTIRE TIME. The only time he came out was when I nursed him, which was every 3 hours. I slept on a little fold out chair and Guy slept in the recliner. There were no showers (not even a community shower) and nothing to really assist mom's who just went through labor. My body was still healing and very, very sore. We made it through and Austin did awesome. He maybe cried once. It was so hard to see him in the little "box" and not be able to hold him or comfort him. 

We came home with Austin on Thursday night and met with my family. My sister and nephew were in town to be with us too. My mom told me that while we were in the hospital, she had been meeting with her doctor about the results of an ultrasound that she had. Mom had been having some very horrible pain in her lower stomach and her doctor thought it may be her gallbladder. It wasn't. And the ultrasound showed tumors and legions on and around her ovaries. 

2 weeks later, on April 10th, she had a total hysterectomy. We would find out while she was in recovery whether or not she had cancer. For 2 weeks I had been in constant prayer that the Lord would heal my mom. That she wouldn't have cancer. That he would protect her thoughts and keep the fear out of her mind. That he would lift her out of this pit and give her a firm place to stand. I had prayed so much that I really believed that she didn't have cancer. 

My friend Angie just wrote an incredible blog post about these life altering experiences that she refers to as game changers. These moments/words spoken to you that completely change your life in an instant. 

You are forgiven.

I love you. 

Will you marry me?

I'm breaking up with you.

You're fired.

I baptize you in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.

Vince and I are moving to Charlotte.
You're pregnant.

It's a boy. 

Yes, it is cancer.

I'll never forgot the moment my mom's doctor said, yes it is cancer. It was the worst experience and pain that I have ever felt. Confused. Terrified. Angry. Breathless. At that moment, everything in my life had completely changed. All of us felt that way. Austin was turning a month old in just a few days and I felt like I had been completely robbed of joy of having a baby. 

The next few days and weeks have been a overwhelming mix of emotions. I feel torn between taking care of Austin, Braylen, my husband, my family and my mom. I want her to feel so overly supported and loved that she feels annoyed by it. But how do I balance everything? I'm nursing a baby every 2 1/2 to 3 hours. I'm sleep deprived. My house looks like a tornado flew through it and my yard looks like a jungle. I haven't made dinner for my family in a month. Guy works full-time and is in school and his schedule is so demanding sometimes. My priorities have changed and things that seemed important have become less. 

My mom was diagnosed with stage 3 ovarian cancer.  I'm so angry that this is what the Lord has in store for us but at the same time I know that he is sovereign. There are many times in my day where I just have to stop and breathe and repeat scripture in my head. I need to remind myself that God is in control, that he is loving and powerful. There are times when I don't know what to pray because I am either angry or I just want to block everything out of my mind, and all I can say is His name. I picture Him lying near my mom, holding her hand or healing her body. I picture Him kneeling beside her, just loving her and comforting her. This is the hardest thing that I have ever dealt with. That any of us will ever deal with. 

There seems to never be "good news" when you are dealing with cancer, but my mom's doctor said that her case looks favorable and that he believes she will return to a normal way of life after the chemo. They first reported that her cancer cells were not aggressively spreading but came back to say that they are aggressively spreading. However, the chemo is designed to knock out those cells that are aggressive so he doesn't seem to be too concerned with it. Her cancer did not spread to her lymph nodes, which is a good thing. The fear is so present with this disease and there are so many statistics that literally make me sick if I read about it. But there is ONE who is bigger and more powerful than any cancer statistic and to HIM we hold tight. Through HIM and by HIM we are saved and have hope everlasting. My sweet mom is clinging tightly to his promises. 

Mom, I see Christ in you. I see his love radiating through your pain and struggles. I already see him transforming you to become more like Jesus. I see hope in the midst of this horrible trial and we will fight this with you and love you through it. 

We will continue to update our blog and use this as a way to support and love my mom, and hopefully add some more pictures of our family. Some of you have asked for her address-you can message me and I will send you their info. Mom starts chemo on Thursday. Please life her up in prayer!!

"Do not let your hearts be troubled; 

trust in God, trust also in me." John 14:1